12 Probable Reasons Your Boyfriend Left You.

Having studied over 40 books, journals, articles,and still counting, on relationships, dating,marriage,the psychology of attraction, why people break up, read and practiced a lot on male and female dynamics. I will give you the no BS answers you need. Albeit, I might hurt you in the process but stay calm and read on.

I have regards for your feelings, I’m not intentional about how you may feel when you’re through reading this. Most people rather care about how you feel than the truth you need to know. You’re an emotional being, we all are. That’s very crucial, but you need the truth now. Don’t you? Are you ready?

Reasons You Might Not Have Considered After Your Boyfriend Dumped You

1. He probably carried MORE WEIGHT in the relationship.

How often did you reach out to him in the course of the relationship? Was he always the first to reach out? Was he always the one to call first, text first, initiate contact in any form? Were you deliberate about not always giving immediate replies to his texts(sadly most ladies do this)?Was he always the one to pay for dates? Was he always the one to pay a visit? In case you never realized, a healthy relationship involves mutual efforts from both parties. No relationship will last if it’s too one-sided. Although, there are some men and women who remain in such relationships but it’s always burdensome and unhealthy. Most people who do such are not confident in their skin and don’t love themselves enough. And guess what, you cannot love the other person more than you love yourself. For instance, i love my body a lot and don’t take junks. I don’t even take drinks (alcoholic or non-alcoholic), especially carbonated drinks. I only take smoothies, freshly squeezed fruit juice and yogurts(once in a while). I love my body that much. Now, if i had a partner that had an uncontrollable desire for carbonated drinks, it will be easy to help out as she breaks that habit because of the dangers of excess sugar. I couldn’t help out if we both had an uncontrollable desire for carbonated drinks.

2. You never gave him SPACE to be himself.

According researchers, the number one killer of relationships not marriage but relationships in the early stage is NEEDINESS. This is a bit in contrast to answer number 1. I know you love him so much but were you always on his neck for attention? Listen nobody’s presence is as valuable as yours. If you can’t be happy when you’re alone, you won’t be happy when you’re with some else and you’ll tend to put more pressure on them to fill the void in you, which they can’t. Scientist have a phenomenon called cosmic loneliness” it’s a feeling of loneliness even in midst of others’. Don’t feel guilty my dear, we all experience this at times. You must enjoy your own company. Enjoy being alone at times. Meditation helps. The divorce rate in America is 50% after the first five years but guess what psychologist, counselors and Relationship experts dug deeper into this and found out that, of the rest 50% that stayed married, most confessed they will never marry the same person again if they were to start all over again. Most end up breaking the marriage before the 10 year window. The cycle only continues. Those in their second marriage have a greater propensity to get a divorce. they whirl out the same complain ‘ i just don’t love him/her anymore’. Relationships are fun-filled but we get caught up in the infatuation stage of the relationship which last for about 9–18 months. No one is responsible for your happiness. Go into relationships to give rather than take. To make the other happy rather than seek happiness.

3. You were always trying to Change him or DICTATE to him.

I know we live in a diverse world but we can’t ignore our biological make-ups. Men are much more in touch with their masculine side and women their feminine side. The masculine energy is all about Purpose, goal driven , smashing through, making decisions, accomplishment, breaking barriers, strength, decisiveness, making plans, having vision and direction. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a woman having these qualities but put simply, if the guy you’re dealing with is more in his masculine side you’ll turn him off if you try to make decisions for him, tell him what to eat, where to go, when to come in, who to speak with, giving orders. A masculine man responds more to genuine suggestions not orders. I’m a man and i must confess, men are naturally egocentric. Not necessarily control-freaks but we like being decisive. Simple.

4. He probably has PERSONAL STRUGGLES.

According Number 1 New-York’s best-selling Author John Gray, in the chapter 3 of his famous book“ Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus”, titled ‘Men go to their caves and women talk’. He emphasizes the need for both men and women to understand our primal instinct of communication during personal internal turmoil. When men have issues they’re dealing with, they love to be alone to think it clearly and find a solution. Not women, most women will rather talk about it just to feel emotionally tensed-free and thereby figure out the solution. Your boyfriend might have personal struggles he’s dealing with. He might not return but it might save you future heartaches. What if he’s gay?, what if he’s got any STD’s? If this is the reason, you should be grateful then and simply wish him luck on his road to victory.

5. You probably didn’t ENCOURAGE his passions, dreams and visions.

I must be deliberate here, men are easily turned on by women who praise them and make them feel important. I heard the terrible story of a man who got home, having lost his job and felt like giving up already. He got home and his wife added more wood to the fire by tearing him done. He just simply walked out and never returned. His wife initially taught, it’s just one of those things. Three days later, he was reported dead. When investigation proceeded together with forensic science. It was figured out that he committed murder. Sincerely, i hope you don’t get to see me personal because I’m going to let out a big secret about me. You can easily turn me on by sincerely praising me and encouraging me when the going gets tough. It’s a very attractive thing to do to a man. Women also love it. You simply weren’t encouraging and it turned him off.

6. You didn’t teat his family well (Most especially his mother and sisters).

This is self-explanatory. You’ve heard the saying “when you marry him/her you marry the whole family”. If he felt you don’t treat his family well, he probably took the decision he believed was best for him. Which was to step back.

7. His mother probably didn’t like you.

I know this is hurtful to even write down but the truth is, some men are not even man enough to make their own choices. Mom pays his rents, washes his clothes, cooks his foods, etc. Her opinions in his life can’t be weighed lightly. If she didn’t like you, he had to leave you to please her. Save yourself prolonged future heartaches and simply let go in peace. He might be a strong, centered guy in his masculinity and still know what he wants but values the wisdom of his mother. You’ve heard of the Proverbs 31 woman, you should read that wisdom chapter in the Bible about the virtuous woman. Guess what, it wasn’t King Solomon’s wisdom. It was simply the advice of a mother to her son on the qualities to look out for in a woman.

8. You’re probably not clean.

According to studies men love varieties, beauty, spicy things. You can easily turn a man on by preparing an unexpected delicious meal for him. Men are very visual, you should know this by now. If you no longer took good care of yourself, and inevitably became complacent, that could have turned him off.

9. He probably heard rumors that you slept around behind his back.

If your boyfriend was a great catch, you probably had unknown competitions. Your female friends didn’t mind doing anything to get rid of you in the line. So they probably did what they knew best , lie that you slept around behind his back. Guess what, this was huge slap on his face.

10. How you start is how you finish.

You probably were too easy for him to get from the onset. I know what you’re thinking ‘Hard to Get’. Everyone plays it consciously or subconsciously both men and women. You might not admit it but we all do. Trust me you do, even if you don’t admit it. Men love challenge, and if he simply,cheaply conquered you from the beginning of the relationship, he easily got bored. Now don’t go to the extreme as some women do but be a little bit of a challenge next time. FAST LOVE IS CHEAP LOVE.

11. He never loved you from the Onset.

This is common amongst women i must say but most partners will always have you has a backup until they get who they really love. Selfish, though but such is life.

12. You’re overweight.

Yes, that’s it. I told you I will hurt you in the process but I’m almost done. I don’t hate you or women. But the truth can be harsh, I’m a relationship expert. Women who her out of size struggle with sustaining a partner. I already wrote an article on this. Click here to read.

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